I have been absence for a reason, things have been difficult to put into words. I have done another cycle, but that’s not all. One thing I cannot mention because the law prohibited. But I can talk about me; I have been lost alone and unhappy pretending I am ok. Now I am back with the magic man and have to face that this is good for me and my child and its ok to ask for help and accept love and help when needed. I can still be my person at the same time. I am starting to realise that if I just let life be and not try to control it and be happy within myself, I have found love and happiness. My heart wants to jump in and give all, but my head does take over and says be careful. If I let all go, I feel I will just want to hide and be scared. My work is finally kicking off, and it is exciting I have some great ideas but needs work out. So my job is now to break these cycles and talk about it as I feel it coming on so can prevent this all happening again.