Category:

Feelings

DiaryFeelings

Missing the affection you gain from someone

by pandora
written by pandora
Missing the affection you gain from someone being present

I am feeling strong but affection is a must

it is the one thing I lust

to have you hold me tight at night

to pull me ever so tight

I am missing the spooning at night

as I fight to be strong and bright

to shine for myself as I follow the light

please god give me strength each night

I must admit I am not doing too bad

but it hasn’t been long to feel sad

https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/self-talk

I long for the right, not the wrong and the bad

so let’s say I have been strong

but I feel a rush that is coming on

I am going with what is good for me

but yet I am not so good you see

well not yet lol

http://pandorasdiary.com.au/emotions-have-a-purpose-even-when-they-are-unwanted/

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DiaryFeelings

Your Relationship

by pandora
written by pandora

Your Relationship

Your relationship is yours and not to be assessed by any one else’s. Every relationship has been different for me. We all grow and have different stages of our life. I grow through every relationship even the one night stands. When i was young I had fun relationships not much commitment just fun and enjoying hanging out. There was one guy I thought I was committed to when i was around 20 years old but I had to live more. Then I got caught up in the drug scene dating a drug dealer of ecstasy and having the time of my life. Those were the days of stripping and parting on the weekends. I must say though I never mixed the two together I always kept them separate. Work was work and fun was fun. !believe it or not!

Then after years I realised I had to stop the drugs before it took over me. Well I thought I was not that bad but still wanted to stop. I went to Melbourne for work and met my ex husband and moved to Melbourne. Now he came into my life to help me give up drugs. He was ante and did not do drug and that was great. Yeas it worked but then the control and obsessiveness came in. Me not reconsidering it until it was too late.

and who am I, with all the abuse and threats. It took me 20 years to wake up to that one. I guess that relationship served it purpose; he did teach me how to run my own business and give up drugs. But then I became his trophy.

T(Imagine this, growing up in a world searching for your soul mate based merely on a formula that has a positive outcome. Each person you meet has their own piece of the formula, and with just a touch of the index finger, you immediately know whether or not that person is the one for you. Now imagine meeting countless people, and you notice some of your friends find their soul mate before you. You begin to feel like your formula isn’t right, so you pretend to choose someone as your soul mate and later after much time you realize you made a big mistake. You wanted to be like your friend just because you noticed those around you were getting into relationships meanwhile you didn’t take the time to find the right one for you based on your own needs.)

https://originalgoodgirl.com/2018/04/14/own-your-relationship/

Your relationship is yours and not to be assessed by any one else’s. Every relationship has been different for me. We all grow and have different stages of our life. I grow through every relationship even the one night stands. When I was young I had fun relationships not much commitment just fun and enjoying hanging out.

There was one guy I thought I was committed to when I was around 20 years old but I had to live more. Then I got caught up in the drug scene dating a drug dealer of ecstasy and having the time of my life. Those were the days of stripping and parting on the weekends. I must say though I never mixed the two together I always kept them separate. Work was work and fun was fun. !believe it or not! Then after years I realised I had to stop the drugs before it took over me. Well I thought I was not that bad but still wanted to stop. I went to Melbourne for work and met my ex husband and moved to Melbourne. Now he came into my life to help me give up drugs. He was ante and did not do drug and that was great. Yeas it worked but then the control and obsessiveness came in. Me not reconsidering it until it was too late. Losing my identity and who am I, with all the abuse and threats. It took me 20 years to wake up to that one. I guess that relationship served it purpose; he did teach me how to run my own business and give up drugs. But then I became his trophy.

Soul mates and connection is not what I was used to until I met a man, we talked a lot of deep emotional stuff connecting in a lot of different ways.  I learnt so much about myself. He was there to listen to support me in a lot of ways that where new to me. however I always felt like some thing was missing. not knowing what is was I left and went back many times to find learn, not sure. A relationship in my eyes become clearer as time went on,  Family and trust was a big part of my upbringing. I am still unclear of what went wrong but we all make choices and maybe some day I can look back and answer it. Now I see things in a different light. still unsure and for sure I get lots of laughs and mind stimulation. finding your true self could take years but enjoy day by day and let in unfold.

some points that help me.

  • Accepting that someone loves you
  • Feeling safe and content it is hard to describe.
  • You will know it when you find it. All is covered and what you dreamed of.
  • Support in the action, the way they do, not just talk, they take action about it, they listen without commenting, just let you talk.
  • They remember what you have said and take action.
  • The look says it all; you do not need to say I love you all the time.
  • You are in a busy public place they will notice your mood change from a distance and ask if you’re ok, them knowing something is up

I AM STILL LEARNING WHAT THIS CONNECTION IS AND HOW LIFE IS MEANT TO BE. SOUL SEARCHING IS FOUND WHEN YOU STOP LOOKING AND ACCEPT WHAT WILL BE WILL BE.

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DiaryFeelings

Does my wall lock them out or keep me prisoner ?

by pandora
written by pandora

Does my wall lock them out or keep me prisoner?

I am at no turning point

It is not a game

The feelings I don’t feel

I hind them in shame

Not knowing what to do any more

But what I already know

Is to shut them out and not feel any more

My life is not painful or is it in love

I just keep going about work and life’s jobs

Not sure if I will ever let someone in

As this is life as I know it is

So I guess I will keep running and keep all away

Because that is my life as in May

Maybe someday someone will know what to say

And make my wall fall away

You all have a nice day

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Feelings

The Power of Emotions have a purpose even when they are unwanted

by pandora
written by pandora

We should not attempt to suppress them as we get taught to.

Our Emotions are energy that manifest in our body. This is from the neck down. To have the need to start paying attention to where our emotional energy in sitting and learn to breath and not hold a breath against it.

The other day I got some new and my feelings just started to come up out and I was a mess crying and feeling choked and the tension of loss all came flooding out through my heart and chest and thought.

We should not attempt to suppress them as we get taught to.

Noticing and let it go and gaining clarity as we move and let it out and go. So pay attention to where it is manifesting in your body. Where is the tension tightness?

Emotions are a vital part of our being, because it is energy and energy cannot just disappear. The emotional energy generated by circumstances of childhood and early life just does not go away just because we do not face it and deny it, no. It is trapped in our body like a time bomb ready to explode.

If we don’t learn how to release it in a healthy way it will course us forms of sickness or cycles of not being able to achieve in life.

As long as we suppress the emotional energy and avoid dealing with it, these wounds will run our lives. We use food, cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, work, religion, television, etc in keeping this all suppressed.

Our voice in our head keeps us from fronting and deal with suppressed energy, emotions. Our emotions tell us who we are. Souls communicate with us through emotional vibrations.

Our soul is what we feel in our heart and our gut, something that resonates. So was this feeling that guttered me from my soul that I am not listening to?

THERE IS TOO MUCH I CANNOT CHANGE.

I have created this world now I need to make it work.

When one of our buttons is pushed our unhealed childhood wounds are present it is hard to difference between intuitive emotions TRUTH and the emotional TRUTH which come from our childhood. The scared little kid inside us comes out in emotion we cannot explain.

http://pandorasdiary.com/2018/09/04/wild-soul-mate-take-it-and-run-with-it/

The wounds don’t go away. they have less power to dictate my life as I heal it.

I am on a spiritual journey and the force is with us.

Be kind to it heal yourself and live the life you want to live.

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Feelings

How we think people see us; open Pandora’s box of love.

by pandora
written by pandora

Open Pandora’s box of love

Opening Pandora’s Box is a saying. Maybe classed this evil is inside but love, beauty, negative can all flow into one journey giving us the giggles.

We always think the worse seeing and picking on what we don’t like about our looks.

But I see the real beauty in side people. What is on the inside comes throw our skin.

You give me inspirations you make me laugh and I am always learning and growing around you. The habits the physical look you are thinking others see is how you see yourself. Change these thought and grow glow. That is what a true friend sees.

as observe an intelligent man who has always got a lot of knowledge to share and always bringing people up and making them feel good about them self.

Yes you have a way of saying it how it is but that is the truth and even if they don’t understand it then and there they will realise later. You have just helped them be a better them without you realising it.

looking at a man with a hot tight ass one of my eye candy’s. I love the way you walk and strut your confidence. You are hot in many ways and you are mine and I love the way you flirt and tease and making me always satisfied.

Your friends think you are amazing and kind and also have a lot to bring to the table in a relationship and as for my friends they only want me to be happy.

It funny after our little break I see you so differently now I see no faults just pleasure and I also feel you are taller now. You have grown in my heart and eyes and I love everything about you. Some time I find myself thinking and picturing the little dance wiggle you do with your hips and it bring be to a little giggle.

 

hearing your voice singing in my ears and I smile. I have you on my mind all the time picturing your eyes ever so soft and loving and sensual.

I have fallen in love and when I say it I tell myself I am not to run from love ever again, stay and enjoy and breathe it into my soul.

I am happy comfortable and cannot see myself anywhere else in this world, only in your arms.

Poem

The way you make me feel is just unreal. I am happy our eyes crossed paths

and you gave me your number

this journey begin of us in the wind

the wind of love, the warmth of lust and to always trust

to give each other inspiration as we gather our information

our information of our path together making it forever

I will be yours truly as I feel you near me and never leave me

I have to know where to hide but in your arms of love and pride

I know this is love for us.

So let enjoy our never-ending story of you and me with glory.

https://powerfulpandorasdiary.com

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