Tag:

LOVE

change your life
General

Are you running or making a change in your life?

by pandora
written by pandora

The best fantastic thing that could happen to me is the stops of my cycles that coursed so much pain.

This pain was so intense I thought this is what life was to be. I would become happy, and my child’s thoughts of something incredible happened to me would be taken away from me. My knowledge of happiness was sad, and to other people, this is not what happiness means to them.

I could not understand why no one got what was so real to me and yet so crazy to others. It took me a lot to know what happiness means and how to find who I was and learn how life works.


The day I became the same dancer thing, I would block out all feelings to treat it as business and make the big bucks. When the other girls let their emotions get in the way, I was healthy and blocked it out and hear another cycle just around the corner.

I thought falling in love meant feeling numb.

That how I treated it as that’s how I knew it. It was partly my subconscious. Wow, what a great combination was running away when I was happy and shutting down to cope with love.

Not a healthy way to live.


Know all this and do the work. I now look at my relationship from different eyes. I ask myself when something pops up, is this my shit or not. I ask myself questions where it comes from, and I also explain to my partner what is going around in my head. Not in an attacking way but just a general conversation, and this works.

Take pride in your won shit, get help, and make it work. Running aguing is not the answer.

We all have a story to tell of our history, share care, and love life.


so my question to you is before you go

Are you running or making a change in your life?

connect https://www.facebook.com/groups/948959232252153

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intimacy
General

What does Intimacy say to you?

by pandora
written by pandora

To me it is a connection sexually and mentally

Something I have been looking for my whole life, understanding myself has been my first understanding of how intimacy should feel. We all ache for this feeling of being loved and wanted and some of us never find it or think they have but live in a lie with themselves. We cannot be intimate if we don’t understand our own feelings of intimacy. I have come from a family of no hugs and no connection, no communication and no affection. It was a violent and alcoholic environment, everything you felt was hidden in you and was not allowed out. To find out even how the women body works were not even heard of. Then I became a woman of expression all my sexual and erotic expressions came too life, yes I became an erotic dancer in clubs and pubs, expressing what I had depressed. this gave me the freedom not only to express myself but to live a life of buying things I wanted when I wanted, freedom. It was fun for a while but then I came to realise yes I might have been expressing my self on stage but when it came to having a relationship it was real and I blocked it all out in the bedroom with my partner. I shut down my emotions as I did not know how to feel erotic and intimate in the bedroom. this is where I was shy and found it hard to feel emotions.

life can work in crazy ways

Then I met my husband and yes over time I became numb and not knowing who I was. 20 years of crazy numb and how do I like my eggs? that is just one question I ask myself when I was finding who am I?

once I went out on my own that is when I became alive and started to find and feel what my body wants and express it again this is where it all begun. intimacy is now what I feel grow and excite myself with.

Dance movement breath and listening to what feels good letting my partner know as well so we can connect explore together. This time we have on our hands from the COVID-19, is a blessing and yes it is hard not to get court up in what everyone is posting and be totally confused. but to be able to sit beside your partner and just talk about whatever and be able to share something together is what we all need to get back to. These are moments to treasure. My experience yesterday was one of those. We both sat out on his balcony with a beautiful slight breeze having a cuppa tea and guess what we were both sewings together. the good old fashion way by hand, stitch by stitch just talking, we are so blessed for these times. Please make sure you capture and share with each other the most important part is telling your partner that you really enjoyed that moment and put a smile on there face. These are the moment that just floats into more moments that become part of our intimacy, because when we start to appreciate each other we have that different look in our eye towards each other and that how magic sex all starts. When we have this look in our eye you don’t need to say I LOVE YOU, your eyes say it all. You are now starting to share a connection of intimacy.

I have played with my body and nurtured and felt my pleasures. doing this I can explore with my partner with confidence sexual expression is my calling and I will help you find your feminine connection so you can explore intimacy in every way dreamt of in your dreams desirer and wild fantasy. we need to feel free to express our self in a sexual way and feel safe and comfortable with our partners to explore intimacy.

Let’s do this together

join me on a journey we all need to take

You don’t have to have a reason to feel good—you’re alive; you can feel good for no reason at all!– Tony Robbins

I am loving me and loving who you could be too.

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Feelings

Saying Goodbye

by pandora
written by pandora

WHEN MY NANNA PASSED

when my nanna past away I put down some words on a piece of paper, only to find it two and half years later as I was cleaning out some of my papers.

So I would love to share this with you as she meant the world to me.

My Nan was an amazingly beautiful model always looking like a lady, always had the plum in her mouth when presenting around people. she loved to be fussed over and always caring for others. As I understand it my nan was the backbone of trying to make sure us kids were in the best place and looked after at the same time.

My foster parents looked after us, Nan was always there to put the pieces together when they fell apart. My foster parent where my Nan and Pa yacht friends. My pa owned a yacht called Wayfarer and it was the first to start the Sydney to Hobart race. Every Sunday as a family we would head out on wayfarer, head to an island call piggies island, we would have a bbq lunch and play in the sand chacing all the shoulder grabs and collect oysters off the rocks to cook in the fireplace.

Then we would sail back to salamander bay and on our way back we would hang our feet over the side of the boat as she sails fast in the wind getting our legs wet and laughing. When we got back we would throw a line over and catch some fish, didn’t matter the size those days as the small one went to the cat, she loved them.

So theses are my words to my Nanna

Monnet Luke

The beauty who touched our lives

Your beauty so positive and bright

Your cheeky sence of humour we loved in the sunlight

Your time has come to join your husband in spirit and joy all so bliss

as you look down upon us, we will all make you proud of us

You will always be in our hearts as we remember your heart

These memories we take with us of the women that made sure her family and friends where alright

You are the best Nanna, wife, mother and sister we looked up too

My greatest Nanna in the whole world

We will all miss that cheeky, glamours and big hearted women we all loved

The Nanna I will always love

her garden so much loved

her cheeky sense of humour so loved

The sailing, the weeding, the hugs,the cookies, the cats are only just some of our memories

My Nanna I will miss so very much and that goes for all of us.

Yes you will always be in our hearts

every day as we move through our lives in every way and every day

love you Nanna.

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